An Open Letter To My Roommates

Hey guys,

You know I generally have no problems with you or your individual lifestyles, but I swear to God, if any one of you watches Across the Universe one more time with the volume turned up louder than Hiroshima, I will fully regulate on your dopey asses. By that I mean I will steal the DVD when no one’s around, climb up on the roof, and Frisbee it onto the roof of that nearby building with all the car parts and crap on it.

I’m sorry, but the only thing worse than hearing the Beatles at three in the morning is hearing you clowns singing along with the Beatles at three in the morning. Maybe all you need is love, but all I need is more than two hours of peaceful slumber. God damn.

Your pal in Christ,

Jim G.