Unsolicited Dirty Projectors Limerick Review

There’s currently this band from Brooklyn
who everyone likes more than Crooklyn
they took my address
And I must confess
I really don’t enjoy the disjointed Caucasian gospel they present on this new Ascending Melody seven inch. While we’re on the topic, what’s the point of even making seven inch records anymore? So collectors will have something to sell off five years from now after the band has broken up and the members have formed far less popular bands? Do people really listen to that much vinyl these days? I mean, if you’re just going to put the songs up on your website anyway, what’s the point? Why waste the paper or the plastic? And hey, Dirty Projectors, why did I have to sign up for your fucking mailing list or whatever to access these two songs I don’t even like? Why can’t you just post MP3s on your website straight up? Why do you need anything from me aside from my general curiosity? Do people have to text you their phone numbers before your CDs will play in their stereos? I just don’t understand why the barter has to be a year’s worth of spam I won’t even read about how you’re playing some shuffleboard court in Sunset Park on Arbor Day just to hear two goddamn songs. I mean, come the f on already.

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