It’s Buffet Time

In high school I knew a kid named Darryl (I think that was his name) who looked like a teenage Gomez Addams. A little swarthy, thick mustache, droopy eyes, slick hair. Darryl was probably best known for being decent at basketball, but to me his defining characteristic was the way he sang EMF’s hit “Unbelievable.” He’d sing the whole thing normally until the chorus. At that point he’d substitute complete nonsense for the “you’re unbelievable!” part. Once when he was singing it, he looked me dead in the eye when he got to the chorus and said with a totally straight face, “it’s buffet time.”

I had no idea if he was referencing something from pop culture or his own weird life, but I can’t recall another instance when I laughed so hard at something for so long. I was crying. I’m not sure why. It was just so odd and unexpected. At the end of the year Darryl signed my yearbook “always keep it buffet”; part of me wishes I had asked him to write that on my arm so I could get it tattooed.

Last I heard, this guy was trying to launch a rap career under the name Dirty B. I hope that’s true. I hope he appreciates that I constantly say “it’s buffet time” to myself to get motivated or cheer myself up or in reaction to the utterly perplexing.