Tag Archive | Knight Rider

Throwback Thursday: Totally Eighties Christmas Edition

Here’s a blurry photo of yours truly on the Christ’s Mass of ’84, awash in plasticine bounty typical of Reagan Era living. Case in point: I’m holding (and am clearly enamored with) a robot that turns into a gun. If that’s not the ’80s in a nutshell I don’t know what is (maybe a robot that turns into a gun wearing Jim McMahon sunglasses?).

To be honest I don’t remember this specific yule too well, but I can tell you I later spent countless hours ramming that “Knight Rider” toy into my Ewok Village playset. I’d set up all my Star Wars figures on the playset like it was the end of Jedi and (from a few feet away) roll Hasselhoff’s Trans Am as hard as I could into the otherwise docile ewok treehouse. KA-BLEWSH!

You shoulda seen how far C-3PO and Zuckuss would fly sometimes—right into Mother Greene’s kitchen!

Ideas For The “Knight Rider” Movie I Hear They’re Making

– an electrical storm causes a Freaky Friday thing where Michael Knight’s brain winds up in K.I.T.T. and vice versa; things aren’t that bad until K.I.T.T. discovers human lust and forces Michael to stalk a teenage girl across several states

– a Hollywood agent overhears Michael and K.I.T.T. bickering; convinced the second voice is coming from some unseen figure in the backseat, the agent immediately signs “The Knight Brothers” and books them on several talk shows; “No, it’s really the car!” becomes America’s hottest catchphrase and the Knights ride high until Al Franken teams up with a VW Bug for his blockbuster return to comedy

– Michael Knight and K.I.T.T. spend two hours discussing the plot holes in Prometheus

– Michael Knight spends two hours getting a perm while K.I.T.T. pranks people at a nearby carwash (i.e. throwing his voice to make it appear as if other cars are talking)

– it’s a crossover with Jaws 5; they put K.I.T.T.’s brain into a shark so he can go in the ocean and try to reason with Jaws (who has returned thanks to the magic of the Leprechaun…so this is also technically a Leprechaun crossover)

– how about just ninety minutes of K.I.T.T. turbo boosting to Ozzy songs?