Tag Archive | Twitter

Billionaires Should Not Exist

Bloody Disgusting has published a very flattering review of my new book A Convenient Parallel Dimension: How Ghostbusters Slimed Us Forever. Ike Oden writes that ACPD is “the definitive, unexpurgated story of the beloved film franchise and its central players. Finally, ghostheads have their own gospel, a Tobin’s Spirit Guide of thoroughly researched and thoughtfully disseminated Ghostbusters history.”

Oden sums up the book as “an addictively written, utterly engrossing read, and an absolute must-have stocking stuffer for fans this holiday season.” Thanks! Although I don’t think the book will fit in a stocking. Maybe you should wrap it up with a nice ribbon.

Remember, if you buy A Convenient Parallel Dimension directly from the publisher right now you can save 35% off with the code 22JOYSALE. This is a cool deal. It saves you some money and ensures that absolutely no money goes to Jeff Bezos. Sale ends on January 6th, 2023.

Speaking of odious billionaire scum, Elon Musk was making it feel extremely gross to remain on Twitter so I deactivated my account. It’s a bummer. For all its pre-Elon problems, Twitter was tough to beat as a news aggregate. There were tons of people on there who clued me in on social issues that never got amplification anywhere else. It was an awesome comedy aggregate too. The hardest laughs in the past decade came from anonymous weirdos tweeting like they had nothing to lose. Most importantly, I met my wife on Twitter.

So Twitter was a valuable resource in those respects and it sucks that the world’s richest edgelord is tanking it because all his kids hate him and his all his ex-wives hate him and everyone sensible person in the world hates him because he’s perpetually full of shit and his cars keep murdering people. Just another reason this country needs a maximum wage. No one should be able to spend $44 billion on a utility just so they can treat it like a pile of Legos. Billionaires should not exist!

Meanwhile, the rest of us are just trying to afford groceries. That reminds me — if you enjoy my writing, please consider becoming a paid subscriber to this blog. For the nominal fee of $2 a month, JG2LAND PREMIUM unlocks a tier of exclusive content that’s continuously growing. Here are the pieces subscribers have enjoyed thus far:

Ass My Kiss (history behind KISS tribute album Kiss My Ass)

Too Hot To Stop (review of Live Wire, a.k.a. the exploding clown movie)

Witchy Woman (review of “Tucker’s Witch” pilot starring Kim Cattrall)

The Individual Will Be Destroyed (review of The Parallax View)

The Anti-Remake Remake? (history behind Gus Van Sant’s Psycho)

“Faerie Tale Theatre,” Reviewed (reviews of Shelley Duvall’s masterwork)

Danny And Sandy Control The Universe (review of Two of a Kind)

Your membership fee also helps support all the free stuff I post around here, like my story about trying to do a Dead Kennedys book and my piece on the deadly Pepsi revolt of 1992. Help support independent writing, help support me and my beautiful wife and my beautiful children and my beautiful guinea pigs. Sign up for JG2LAND PREMIUM today.


$2 a month — that’s cheaper than eggs!

Enjoy your holiday season and remember, the pandemic is not over. Please keep masking and avoiding large crowds. Let’s make 2023 the safest year yet. I mean, as safe as we can be in a country with no gun control.

When The Going Gets Weird, The Weird Turn Pro

Hold on to your butts: JG2’s launched a (reasonably) straightforward Twitter account. Allegedly this will A) further my career and B) help me realize my dream of being “retweeted” by a Ice-T. Better start compiling flattering pictures of my ass right now.

In other news, hey, wouldn’t you just love to read a comprehensive biography of legendary punk rockers the Misfits? Well, don’t get your undies all in a bunch, but I’ve been working on one for the past eight months. I don’t really want to get into too much [read: any] detail about this project right now for a number of reasons, but I will say this: if you think you know the full story about this band, you’re wrong. It’s more of a soap opera than your devilocked head could ever imagine.

A bulletin has just been handed to me: it’s two-thirty in the morning and I still haven’t watched the latest episode of “South Park.” That needs to be amended before the sun rises.

Things That Need To Go Audi 5000 In 2011

– Juggalo-centric journalism

– the false notion that Twitter has “changed everything”

– false promises from Dr. Dre regarding Detox

– false praise / worship of anyone who just died

– the world forcing basic cable dramas down my throat

– Brett Favre penis controversies

– Manhattan chain restaurant controversies

– the trend of declaring yourself “Team” something

– the glut of cooking competition reality shows on basic cable

– “The Simpsons” (it’s limping into final season “Happy Days” badness)

– bed bugs

– people freaking their shit about bed bugs

– that Drake Sprite commercial

– curb crawlers

– crap cunts

– Conan O’Brien’s beard

– negative vibe merchants like this blog post

Top Ten Things JG2 Did Not Care About In 2009

1. Jon Gosselin’s sunburned and fame-heavy jowls

2. Mafia Wars

3. The increased popularity of Twitter amongst people over forty

4. The increased popularity of vampires amongst people under twenty

5. The debate over any politician’s secret agenda bent on undermining American values

6. A-Rod

7. Anything Wil.i.am said or did

8. Anything related to “The Hipster Grifter” (save nude pix)

9. Facebook selling my personal info to Google in exchange for virgin blood

10. Levi Johnson’s big stupid Alaskan dick propping up a magazine everyone thought folded in 1995